The first day of the republican national convention is in the books and here is what we've learned.
First, Donald Trump's initial entrance onto the speaker's platform was stolen straight from any number of episodes of WWE Smack Down.
For those of you uninitiated in the world of professional wrestling, Smack Down and other shows like it primarily feature men who possess bulging biceps and wear far too much hair gel. They come into packed arenas accompanied by pyrotechnical displays, loud rock music, intense back lighting, and fake fog. Yesterday in Cleveland, Brother Trump eschewed the pyro display, but he did go with the back lighting, fake fog, and part of the classic rock anthem, "We Are the Champions." The song was played without permission from the band, Queen, who quickly condemned his unauthorized use of it.
But let's not digress. In the world of the WWE the contestants assault each other with a fair amount of genuine athleticism and a high degree of fake violence which drives the crowds at sold out venues into a wild frenzy. This despite the fact everyone there knows the outcome of the matches are predetermined and the wrestling is actually more akin to movie stunt work than a real sport.
When not attacking each other the performers grab microphones and address their exuberant audiences with language skills normally associated with 10th grade drop outs. During these harangues, filled with tortured syntax and incomplete sentences, they promise their fans further victories while throwing out threats and crude insults to their opponents.
Does any of that sound familiar to those of you who have listened to Donald J. Trump speak?
That's right, Don Trump, the next republican presidential nominee, learned his political and speaking skills not from Lincoln, Reagan, or even Dick Nixon, but rather Hulk Hogan, the late, Roddy Piper, and Vince McMahon. And last night, as it has been this entire campaign, it was on display.
The second thing we learned from the proceedings is that while Trump's wife, Melania is a cool and composed speaker she's also a stone cold plagiarist.
Her well received speech was grudgingly acknowledged by even the most liberal of commentators to be smooth and spot on. Then a guy named Jarrett Hill, who had heard some of it before got onto social media.
Within a half hour the crew at MSNBC had dredged up a speech made by Michelle Obama at the 2008 democratic convention. Melania Trump had used over two meaty paragraphs of it, nearly word for word.
Even though earlier in the day Mrs. Trump had assured NBC's Matt Lauer on tape she had written almost the entire thing herself, MSNBC's panel tried to go easy on her. To a person they blamed unknown speech writers, who they said, "did her a great disservice."
Today, as we should have known, Trump's people, including campaign manager, Paul Manafort began a spin that is best described as an exercise in absurdity. Manafort and others claim none of the speech was taken from Mrs. Obama's eight year old address, despite repeated side by side video comparisons which conclusively proves it was.
Manafort even went so far as to blame Hillary Clinton for the entire hubbub, saying, "I mean this is once again an example of when a woman threatens Hillary Clinton how she seeks out to demean her and take her down. It's not going to work." He also said, "I mean she (Mrs. Trump) was speaking in front of 35 million people last night, she knew that. To think that she would be cribbing Michelle Obama's words is crazy."
Of course Hillary Clinton had absolutely nothing to do with either the speech, or blowing the whistle on it. On the other hand saying crazy shit has become a hallmark of Trump's run for the presidency. After all, we're still searching for those tens of thousands of Muslims celebrating in New Jersey the candidate claims to have seen on the day of the 9-11 attacks.
Well what do you expect? The truth is Trump and his campaign have a well documented history of vulgar lies and exaggerations. After they're exposed the man and his organization simply plows on without recanting any of them. The theory apparently being the public and media will forget his prior savage nonsense as soon as El Don changes the subject.
Tragically, so far, it's a plan that has worked.
Even today FOX News, treats the incident as a minor side bar to a successful start of the RNC--referring to it as, "accusations of some similarities between the speeches." The local republican newsletter, known as The Oklahoman didn't mention it at all.
Yes, by the time the convention is over hardly anyone will remember Melania Trump stole Michelle Obama's words. The Trump fans certainly won't care and the rest of us will be concentrating on the latest outrage perpetrated by their run amok nominee.
All in all it's an act ol' Rowdy Roddy Piper would have been proud of. That's right baby, screw reality, just keep the show loud and moving. Always keep the show loud and moving.
sic vita est