Thursday, December 28, 2017

Roy Moore Just Can't Take a Hint

You can say one thing about Roy Stewart Moore. He never takes no for an answer.

In 2001, while he was chief justice of the Alabama Supreme Court he unveiled a massive granite monument of the ten commandments in the State Judicial Building. Two years later, after a federal court ordered its removal, Moore refused to comply with the decision. By the time the dust settled both he and the monument had been removed from the premises.

Inspired by the failed rebellion he ran for governor of the state in 2006 and 2010, but lost both times in the republican primaries. In 2012 he ran once again for the chief justice position and won a second stab at the job.

In 2015 the United States Supreme Court declared gay marriage to be legal. It was a ruling Moore described as, "...manifestly absurd and unjust...contrary to reason and divine law and not entitled to precedential value." He then ordered 68 state probate judges not to issue marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples.

Because of his illegal order the Alabama Court of the Judiciary--a nine member panel made up of judges, lawyers and citizens who oversee members of the state court system--removed him from office a second time. CNN reported that in the Court of the Judiciary written decision they used terms about Moore's conduct which included things such as, "grossly inconsistent with his duties, incomplete, misleading, and manipulative."

Moore's immediate response to his removal was, "This was a politically motivated effort by radical homosexual and transgender groups to remove me as Chief Justice of the Supreme Court because of outspoken opposition to their immoral agenda."

So what is a man to do after losing two elections and getting fired from the same job twice? In Roy Moore's case it was run for the United States Senate.

Actually it didn't seem like a bad idea once the chubby Nazi, Steve Bannon got on board and Luther Strange, a Trump endorsed candidate, was beaten like a bad dog in the GOP primary.

Then, as they always seem to do when it comes to His Honor, things went all to hell. Women came out of the woodwork with tales of not just past questionable behavior, but outright pedophilia. To make a long story short Roy Moore went from a sure thing to blowing the election by 1.5%. It was the first time a democrat won a U.S. senate seat in Alabama since 1992.

But never count ol' Roy Boy out. To this moment he has refused to concede the election and last night he asked an Alabama court to delay a state board from certifying democrat, Doug Jones as the winner. The reason? Why the great 21st century bugaboo of all far right wing losers--voter fraud.

That's right. If a white conservative loses an election in Alabama, or anywhere, it must be because either thousands of people of color voted illegally, or that Illuminati son of a bitch George Soros rigged the damn machines.

The motion cited three experts including one Richard Charnin who claimed the probability that the votes in Alabama were accurately counted are, "less than one in 15 billion." Charnin, who says he has three different degrees in math, has previously argued it is mathematically impossible for John F. Kennedy's assassination not to have been a vast conspiracy. He also maintains the 2004 Bush-Kerry presidential election was fixed, as were a couple of Florida and Wisconsin governors races, and that Hillary Clinton stole most, if not all, the democratic presidential primaries she won in 2016.

In addition, Moore issued a statement saying he took a polygraph test after the December 12th election which proved he not only didn't feel up the women who accused him of indecent behavior, but that he didn't even know them.

On the other hand the twice cashiered judge failed to offer any reason why he didn't take the test immediately after the accusations came to light. You know, before the votes were actually cast. Perhaps it was simply a matter of not being able to find the right sort of stooge to administer the thing in a timely manner.

In any case word comes this afternoon that the Alabama court rejected Moore's request and the Alabama State Canvassing Board, chaired by republican Secretary of  State, John Merrill, certified Jones as the winner.

So are we finally done with this crazy fuck? History tells us absolutely not. God only knows what Moore's next move will be. Further court challenges are a distinct possibility. However, even if they all fail--and one can't imagine them not--Roy Moore will find some other office to run for because that is exactly what he does.

Indeed, some people just can't take a hint and unfortunately for us all, this savage clown is one of them.



12-28-17

Monday, December 25, 2017

Parallel Universes, Being Even More Happy in Puerto Rico, and Merry Christmas America

The multiverse is a theory that states many universes exist parallel to each other.

www.dummies.com



Actually it isn't a theory. We have definitive proof alternate, or parallel universes do exist. That's because, as we all know, Donald John Trump lives in one.

After displaying his unique sense of Christmas cheer by posting derogatory tweets about Deputy FBI Director, Andrew McCabe, and FBI General Counsel, James Baker--acts which at least two legal experts said could be interpreted as attempts to intimidate potential witnesses--Mr. Trump gave his best wishes to all branches of the military via a video conference call.

During the call he saved his kindest words for the Coast Guard. "You've done such an incredible job in Texas, Florida, and Puerto Rico," he said. "Many republicans are very happy, but I have to tell you the people of Florida, Texas, and Puerto Rico and lots of other states are even more happy. What a job you've done--saving thousands and thousands of lives."

Really?

Well let's give Puerto Rico a call and ask them exactly how happy they are this Christmas Day. Good luck getting through though. There are plenty of places on the island, which is sovereign U.S. territory, where phone service is either still unavailable, or spotty at best.

Tragically that's the least of their problems. Hurricane Maria blew across Puerto Rico on September 20th of this year. As of December 11th roughly 50% of the island's 3.4 million people were still without electrical power. The AP reports the town of Morovis, population 30,000, located in the central mountains is one of nine municipalities still waiting for even a single light bulb to work without help from portable generators, or converted car batteries.

According to the AP roughly 1,000 homes in Morovis lost their roofs and running water wasn't available until the first week of November. Until then laundry and bathing chores were performed in a nearby river. Representatives from FEMA didn't hit town until the first week of December and then it was only to, "assess the damage." As of Christmas Day not one of the American citizens living in Morovis has received a penny in federal assistance and those roofs remain mostly tarps hung by volunteers and the locals themselves.

Island wide, experts say the electrical grid is anywhere from 65% to 70% up and running, but they're unsure how the juice is distributed because the system which figures that out still doesn't work. The Army Corps of Engineers is now saying it will be May of 2018 before power is fully restored.

It is estimated 30,000 people lost their jobs as a direct result of Maria while a huge portion of the agricultural industry was wiped out. It has also been reported over 200,000 Puerto Ricans have fled to Florida and unknown numbers have moved to other locales on the mainland because of the disaster.

None of this horrific shit matters to Don Trump though. He signed some things, threw a few rolls of paper towels to the masses, then walked away. For him, in his parallel universe, Puerto Rico is fixed--it is, in the vernacular, old news and therefore nothing to worry about as he gets ready to tee off yet again at Mar-a-Lago.

A cynic might say the nightmare in Puerto Rico would already be over if it was part of the mainland U.S. and the first language of most of the population wasn't Spanish. However that would be an unsubtle hint the man in the White House is a racist asshole.

Oh wait. In my universe he is.

Merry Christmas America.


12-25-17


Tuesday, December 19, 2017

George Zimmerman Revisited: Knowing How to Handle Assholes and Feed Alligators

During the years and months leading up to February 26, 2012 George Zimmerman had been a busy beaver. Wikipedia notes that between 2004 and 2012 he made nearly 50 calls to the Sanford, Florida police reporting everything from loud parties to open garage doors, and children playing in the street.

Despite his hyper active surveillance efforts, by the winter of 2012 the gated community where he lived, The Retreat at Twin Lakes, was apparently on a slow slide into chaos. In the prior 13 months police had been called to the 260 unit gated complex 402 times. Burglaries were on the uptick and there had even been a shooting. In response to the rising tide of crime in September, 2011 the residents, with police help, met to form a neighborhood watch program. At the meeting the ever vigilant, Zimmerman was named its coordinator.

The first and most steadfast rule police laid down for members of the new volunteer group was they could not be walking the grounds armed. After all, the last thing cops needed was a bunch of Wyatt Earp wannabe's roaming around at night taking pot shots at someone taking out the trash, or walking home from a 7-11.

George Zimmerman got the memo, but on the 26th, when he began to follow, "...a real suspicious guy," he was packing a Kal-Tec PF-9, 9mm hand gun. His excuse would later be since he wasn't officially on duty it was perfectly okay for him to be carrying a weapon. Hey, it's Florida for God's sake, everyone carries, right?

The, "real suspicious guy," he noticed was 17 year old African-American, Trayvon Martin. Martin was in Sanford with his father. They were visiting the old man's fiancé and her son at The Retreat at Twin Lakes. The younger Martin was returning from--that's right--a convenience store carrying a bag of skittles and a bottle of cold tea. He was also talking on his cell phone to a friend in Miami and wearing a sweatshirt with the hood up because it was raining.

Zimmerman told police dispatch, "This guy looks like he's up to no good, or he is on drugs, or something." Moments later he said, "These assholes, they always get away."

Meanwhile, Martin was telling his friend, Rachel Jeantel over the phone that some strange guy was watching him from his car. She later testified she told him to run for the apartment where he was staying.

What happened next was a uniquely American tragedy. On George Zimmerman's part, it involves racial paranoia and assumptions, and the ability of anyone in this country to get his, or her hands on a gun, no matter what their qualifications, or judgment. As for Trayvon Martin, like so many young black Americans these days, he was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Despite the police dispatcher telling him, "We don't need you to do that," Zimmerman exited his vehicle and followed Martin. There was a confrontation. Zimmerman assumed he was facing a burglar. All Trayvon Martin knew was some strange dude--maybe a mugger, or sexual predator--was accosting him.

Zimmerman, predictably, shot the unarmed 17 year old to death during a brief struggle. Then all hell broke loose.

Thanks to George Zimmerman the ripples of that storm are still being felt. Two days ago the New York Daily News reported Zimmerman blew his top when a film crew shooting a documentary about the killing showed up at the houses of his parents and an uncle allegedly unannounced. According to him, executive producers JayZ and Michael Gesparro were indirectly harassing his relatives.

Well, sort of.

It turns out Zimmerman's main complaint is his ex-wife is getting paid an unspecified amount of money to participate in the documentary while the producers are refusing to pay his parents and family members anything.

The Daily News reports he told an interviewer on the website, "Blast," "I know how to handle assholes who fuck with me. I have since February, 2012. Anyone who fucks with my parents will be fed to an alligator."

Ah yes, there's the perfect response. Imagine the reaction of white America if O.J. Simpson went off on some filmmaker and told him something like, "Listen, I fucked up Ron and Nicole and if you don't pay my family for being in this movie, I'll do the same to you."  

Of course, this won't be the first time the Zim Man has tried to cash in on Trayvon Martin's death. In May of 2016 he put the gun he used that night up for auction on two different sites--the first one deleted the offer as soon as they realized who was selling what. Zimmerman wrote a blurb on the second site which said, "The firearm for sale is the firearm that was used to defend my life and end the brutal attack from Trayvon Martin on 2/26/12. Now is your opportunity to own a piece of American history. Good Luck."

To further hype the sale he also told people, the Smithsonian Institute had expressed interest in having the gun.

How very Trumpian of him.

The Smithsonian issued a statement immediately after they had been told of Zimmerman's claim. It read, "We have never expressed interest in collecting George Zimmerman's firearm and have no plans to ever collect, or display it in any museums."

God bless the good people at the Smithsonian. At least someone around here has retained a sense of decency. These days, thanks to the likes of George Zimmerman and others, it is, as we all know, an increasingly rare commodity.




12-19-17

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Roy Moore Narrowly Loses in Alabama, Don Trump Says He Was Right With An Exclamation Point and Don't Think Democrats Have Turned the Corner

The MSNBC talking heads were jubilant late last night and early this morning as former U.S. Attorney, Doug Jones pulled off an upset of massive proportions in Alabama. Well, sort of massive.

It's true Alabama hadn't elected a democrat to the United States Senate since 1992 and that guy, Richard Shelby, was so conservative he switched to the republican party in 1994. Unfortunately it's also true, Roy Moore, despite being the craziest right wing fucker this side of conspiracy hawker Alex Jones came within 1.5% points of winning the seat vacated by Jeff Sessions last year.

Indeed, it wasn't Moore's personal politics which cost him the election. Alabama republicans were fine with him getting removed from the bench twice for refusing to uphold the laws of the land, saying on tape the nation would be better off without every constitutional amendment after number 10, then claiming the last time America was great was during the era of slavery. That shit actually worked for them. No, it was only after multiple women came forward revealing he had a history of predatory sexual behavior so ghastly it would make Caligula shrink in horror that his campaign began to flounder.

The GOP establishment quickly blamed the entire election debacle on Steve Bannon. Matt Drudge went so far as to say Luther Strange, the short time incumbent who Moore beat in the primaries, would have won last night in a landslide. He's correct. Strange would have, but he couldn't get to the general election, thanks to Moore and, at least in part, Bannon.

Josh Holmes, former chief of staff to Mitch McConnell went further in a tweet. He posted, "Before we get to the results, I'd just like to thank Steve Bannon for showing us how to lose the reddest state in the union and Governor Ivey for the opportunity to make this national embarrassment a reality."

Ivey, who replaced disgraced Alabama Governor Robert Bentley--yes, it was another sex scandal--moved the election up from November of next year to last night. Holmes theory apparently is given another year in the senate, Strange would have solidified his chops as a true conservative, distanced himself from Bentley, who appointed him, and, of course, been able to vote for the GOP's nefarious tax plan.

Donald J. Trump managed to lend his support to not one, but two Losers in the race. During the campaign he backed Strange to the point of making a personal appearance for him. After Strange lost the primary runoff, El Donald began a slow, but inexorable shift to Moore. By last week Trump was all in, actively endorsing the judge through Twitter, public statements, and robocalls which flooded the phone lines in Alabama.

Today, in the face of defeat, Trump being Trump, tweeted, "I said Roy Moore will not be able to win the General Election. I was right! Roy worked hard, but the deck was stacked against him!"

God, don't you just love those exclamation points.

Doug Jones won the election by 20,715 votes out of 1,344,406 cast. Trump later hinted it was the write in votes which cost Moore the senate seat. He is partly right. There were 22,819 write in ballots, at least one of which went for Alabama football coach Nick Saban.

In the end though, besides preying on teen aged girls, Moore exposed another dark side of  himself to a potent demographic through sheer stupidity. When the charges of sexual misconduct hit the fan his initial response was to send an attorney named Trenton Garmon on two different cable networks to counter them. It took only minutes during both appearances for Moore's representative to prove himself a grinning, high energy, racist clod.

Garmon's vile buffoonery and the whole America hasn't been great since slavery thing wasn't lost on black Alabamans. Yesterday they represented 30% of the total number of voters. Doug Jones, who had successfully prosecuted two KKK members for the bombing of a black church which killed four young girls, got 96% of their vote. The same CNN exit poll showed 98% of black women voted for the democrat. Those numbers are higher than Barack H. Obama's were when he was on the ballot in Alabama during two presidential elections.

It is tempting for hard core progressives to dance in the streets today. But let's face it, Alabama didn't elect Bernie Sanders, or Elizabeth Warren to the senate. Even if Doug Jones wanted to emulate them, which is doubtful, he can't because he is up for re-election in three short years. The simple reality of self preservation dictates he not go all "Dilly Dilly" when the liberal stein of ale is served at the senate bar.

Yes, democrats won a battle yesterday in what is normally hostile territory. Just don't think they, or the country have turned some magical corner. That one is still way down the street in this gruesome age of Trump and trailer park fascism.


sic vita est


12-13-17

Friday, December 8, 2017

Who Needs Drugs in the Age of Trump?

When it comes to politics in this age of Trump, who needs drugs? That's right, why take acid when reality is far stranger than any chemically induced hallucination can ever be?

Take for example the case of republican congressman Trent Franks. He is resigning his Arizona seat because people began to question the ethics of a man who approached two of his female staffers to see if they'd be amenable to serving as gestational surrogates for he and his wife.

A media outlet in Arizona immediately called up former Maricopa County Sheriff, Joe Arpaio to see if he would be willing to fill the void. Arpaio, who was shopping at a deli for, "meat," when he took the call told the interviewer, Arizona and the nation was losing a great man in Franks, but no he wasn't interested in running for the house. However, Arpaio said, "I am seriously, seriously, seriously considering running for the U.S. senate..."

While Sheriff, Mr. Arpaio spent much of his time directing his deputies to pull over anyone who even faintly resembled being Hispanic in order to see if they were in the country illegally. After refusing to obey a court order instructing him to stop this racist shit, he was convicted of criminal contempt. Prior to his conviction and before Don Trump assumed office he had enlisted the help of a, "volunteer posse," whose sole aim was to prove Barack Obama was born somewhere, anywhere, but here in the United States. After the conviction Mr. Trump pardoned him in a public ceremony held at the same moment Hurricane Harvey was slamming into the Texas coast.

The good news is the pardon might be the last help the 85 year old Arpaio gets from The Big Orange Guy. Trump's main big money Political Action Committee is already backing Kelli Ward for the seat being vacated by Jeff Flake. Flake, as many know, is quitting the senate because he thinks Donald John Trump is not just a crude and unrepentant scam artist, but utterly nuts--well that and every recent poll shows Ward kicking his ass.

Down in Alabama a comment made in September by alleged pedophile and republican senate candidate, Roy Moore has resurfaced. Resurfaced because even though the Los Angeles Times reported it nearly three months ago, no one really paid any attention until now.

Hey, it's tough keeping track of a brief moment of absurdity in the middle of an avalanche of craziness.

At a Moore campaign rally one of the few African Americans in attendance asked the candidate something along the lines of, "When was the last time America was great?"

Moore said, "I think it was great at the time when families were united--even though we had slavery--they cared for one another. Our families were strong, our country had a direction."

Aside from the fact it's highly unlikely any family who was enslaved would consider things great, the direction our country was headed in, "at the time," was straight toward a fucking civil war. By its end somewhere between 620,000 to 700,000 Americans serving on both sides were either dead, or had been wounded.

Meanwhile, although not technically politics, word comes that one James Tracy has filed a suit against Florida Atlantic University. Tracy claims FAU illegally fired him from his teaching position in January,2016 because it didn't like what he was saying about the 2012 mass shooting in Newtown, CT.  The monstrous act, committed by Adam Lanza, left 20 elementary school students dead, along with six school staff, and the shooter's mother.

The FAU response (Go Owls!) is it fired, Tracy not because he continuously claims the nightmare at Sandy Hook School never happened, but that he refused to submit a form, required of every university employee which lists their outside activities. In addition Florida Atlantic says Tracy violated the school's rules by using university property and facilities to write and publish his blog plus produce a podcast.

Mr. Tracy first hit the headlines back in 2015 after he sent the parents of six year old murder victim, Noah Pozner a certified letter. In it he demanded that Lenny and Veronique Pozner, among other things, furnish him proof their son actually existed.

Yes, no drug could compete with this severe weirdness. Nor would you ever want to take one which might come close. At least I wouldn't, but then I'm not nearly as adventurous as I was 40, or 50 years ago.

But hey, that's just me.


sic vita est


12-8-17

Monday, December 4, 2017

Richard Nixon, John Dowd, Acid Flashbacks, Don Trump, and Roy Moore

When the President does it, that means it is not illegal.

Richard M. Nixon to David Frost, 1977.


The President cannot obstruct justice because he is the chief law enforcement officer and has every right to express his view of any case.

John Dowd, one of an ever growing number of lawyers representing Donald J. Trump in a recent interview.



Acid flashbacks, contrary to the dire warnings coming from those who have never actually done LSD, really are rare occurrences. However, sometimes you have a brush with something so bizarre, so straight from a twisted past experience, you have to wonder if you aren't in the throes of one.

The latest episode was triggered by the words of John Dowd. He was speaking in defense of a President who is on the cusp of making Dick Nixon's criminal behavior look like two bit shop lifting.

What started the latest uproar in the main stream press and among Trump doubters every where was, of course, a weekend tweet. It was posted by Trump's Twitter account, but there is some debate about who actually wrote it. The gist of the message--meant to distance El Don from former National Security Advisor, Mike Flynn--was that Flynn had been fired because, "he lied to the vice president and the FBI," about meetings with the Russian ambassador last December.

Oops.

As with all comedy, slapstick to dark satire, timing is everything. Lying to the Vice President isn't a criminal act, although it's certainly a breach of trust and disloyal. That's why, according to Trump, then and now, Flynn was canned.

The trouble is, within a scant few hours of the firing, Trump was urging then FBI Director James Comey to drop the bureau's investigation into Flynn's nefarious activities. Comey says he refused and not long afterward, as we all know, he was also shown the door.

Unlike fibbing to the Vice President, lying to the FBI is a felony. One which Flynn just copped to. If Trump knew his national security advisor had committed that crime, which the tweet indicates he did, his leaning on Comey to stop the investigation and the subsequent firing of the director begins to look suspiciously like obstruction of justice.

The Big Orange Guy denies he ever put heat on Comey to drop the investigation, but Comey, followed the first rule of all professional bureaucrats. He covered his ass by documenting the entire meeting immediately after it happened.

John Dowd, besides the whole president can't obstruct justice thing, is now saying the incriminating tweet wasn't written by the boss at all--that he wrote it and he'd like to plead guilty to nothing more than poor composition.

If that is what happened at least one legal expert said the president's counsel should be disbarred for so carelessly exposing Mr. Trump to such charges. Brother Dowd shouldn't worry too much about getting cashiered from the legal profession though. That's because lawyers rarely get disbarred for lying on behalf of their client, hell it's expected of them. And, let's face it, everyone to the left of Steve Bannon is convinced it was Don at the keys that morning no matter what his attorney says.

Meanwhile, a CBS/YouGov poll of Alabama republicans shows 71% of them believe all the sordid accusations against Roy Moore, the GOP candidate for the U.S. Senate, are false. Huge majorities of those people think the whole affair was a frame job perpetrated by either the democrats, the national media, or both. 

To celebrate the news Trump tweeted, "Democrats refusal to give even one vote for massive Tax Cuts is why we need republican Roy Moore to win in Alabama. We need his vote on stopping crime, illegal immigrants, Border Wall, Military, Pro Life, VA, Judges, 2nd Amendment and more. No to Jones, a Pelosi/Schumer Puppet!"

That's right, fuck Moore's victims and full speed ahead with the agenda. 

Lock up your teenaged daughters Washington D.C, 'Ol Roy Boy is on his way.


sic vita est


12-4-17