Tuesday, May 10, 2016

The Walking Dead in Nebraska, the Ghost of Albert Speer in Cleveland, Someone Named Sarah Thinks People are Listening, and the Search for an Accomplice Has Begun

I've always had a weakness for lost causes once they're really lost.

Rhett Butler

It appears Ted Cruz does too. Last week he suspended his presidential campaign after getting trounced in Indiana. However, earlier today he told the head of his radio propaganda machine, Glenn Beck there might be some sort of "Walking Dead" zombie chance of a resurrection.

The Hill reports Cruz told Beck, "We launched the campaign intending to win. The reason we suspended our campaign was that with the Indiana loss I felt there was no path to victory. If that changes we will certainly respond accordingly."

The change he's speaking about is beating Don Trump in today's Nebraska primary, a winner take all contest with 36 delegates up for grabs. The latest theory apparently is, maybe I can win a state after I've quit, while not showing up, or saying a word.

Hey, why not? Nothing else has worked--might as well give it a whirl and see what happens.

Meanwhile, Speaker of the House, Paul Ryan has volunteered to step down as the chairman of the GOP convention if Trump wants him to. One can easily imagine speaker Ryan praying night and day the presumptive nominee will take him up on the offer. After all, the affair in Cleveland now has the distinct possibility of eerily resembling one of those horrific pre WWII Nuremberg rallies put together by Albert Speer for his old pal, Adolf Hitler.

Besides, the list of republicans who don't want to be anywhere near the place is a distinguished one. Included in the number of no shows will be former nominees Mitt Romney and John McCain. And of course everyone in the world named Bush.

Ryan, has stated, he's, "not ready," to endorse Trump, but has left that door open slightly, depending on what Trump says and does over the next couple of months. Ryan's refusal to immediately jump on the bandwagon incensed a woman named Sarah Palin who, rumor has it, used to be relevant in some republican circles.

Palin proclaimed to anyone interested she will back Ryan's opponent in the Wisconsin republican primary election later this year. It is not clear if Ms. Palin even knows the rube's name--it's Paul Nehlen--but by God she is all for him and promises us Ryan will be Cantorized. It is a reference to former house majority leader Eric Cantor, who was defeated two years ago in a GOP primary by a tea party howler because he hadn't acted crazy enough on the house floor.

Finally, it's been reported the ever violent Corey Lewandowski will head up a committee searching for El Don's running mate. Lewandowski, when he isn't manhandling female reporters, also serves as Trump's campaign manager. Unfortunately for us all we know Lewandowski's team will come up with some terrible, brute, fool, or an oily, amoral, grifter because, quite frankly, they're the only type of people who can abide Donald Trump.

So there we have it on this day, Tuesday, May 10th, 2016. There is a zombie non campaign in Nebraska, the specter of mass torch lit demonstrations set to the music of Richard Wagner looms in Cleveland, dire political threats have been issued by someone who believes people actually listen to her, and, at last, the search for an accomplice to future crimes, is being directed by a hired thug.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, is it any wonder the bar is now open.

I didn't think so.


1 comment:

  1. Keep the bar open, and well stocked. All that remains is for Mr. Trump to be named Time's Man (person) of the Year. 1938 plus 78. Can history repeat?