Fox, Breitbart, Drudge, and a Guy Named Rod Wheeler Go All Conspiracy Theory

Here we go. It took a little while for the latest iteration of right wing conspiracy craziness to gain traction, but thanks to a Washington D.C. Fox outlet, Breitbart, The Drudge Report, and a guy named Rod Wheeler we are on our way.

Early in the morning of July 10th, 2016, 27 year old Seth Rich was walking home from a bar in Washington D.C. He was a block, or so from his place in the district's Bloomingdale neighborhood. Tragically he never made it. After responding to a report of shots fired metro D.C. police found Rich on the sidewalk. His hands, knees, and face were bruised up and he'd been shot twice in the back. He died later that day at a local hospital.

Police have yet to identify a suspect, or recover the weapon. Their theory then and now is Rich was the victim of a robbery attempt gone wrong. It is a big city crime so common, one can picture it happening. He's confronted by a thug at four something in the morning on dark street in an area which had suffered a rash of muggings. He either puts up a fight, or gets beaten just because the dude, or dudes want to prove how bad they are. Then, in an attempt to escape the nightmare, Seth Rich breaks away and makes a run for it, but is gunned down from behind.

Every piece of evidence indicates Mr. Rich's death was a tragic case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Unless, of course, you're one of the right wing conspiracy meth heads who haunts the internet. You know, a member of that elite club of alt. journalists who claim the mass killing at Newtown, CT never took place and Hillary Clinton personally ran a child sex ring out of the back room of a Washington pizza joint.

Yes, because Seth Rich worked for the Democratic National Committee there had to be more nefarious powers at work than your average street punk. The twisted theory floating around out there goes this way. Russia didn't hack the DNC and neither did anyone else. Seth Rich, appalled by the ruthless behavior of Hillary Clinton, Donna Brazile, and John Podesta, secretly gave 44,000 plus documents to WikiLeaks via a journalist in order to expose their crimes against the nation and humanity. At some point he was identified as the mole sabotaging the democrats so he was terminated with extreme prejudice, or, as the alt. news guys like to say, assassinated.

Earlier this week former police officer turned private investigator Rod Wheeler sorta kinda agreed. He told a D.C. Fox outlet, Seth Rich had contact with WikiLeaks and the proof was on Rich's lap top which was being held by either metro D.C. police, or the FBI. He also said the local cops had been told by unknown persons to stop investigating the murder.

It didn't take but a moment for Breitbart, Fox, the Drudge Report, and the Russians to jump all over Wheeler's statements. In an instant they were screaming to high heaven Vladimir Putin had been set up and played the patsy by the gangsters at the DNC. Those lonely voices over on YouTube, who have been singing this tune for nearly a year became absolutely orgasmic.

According to a separate Fox report, Rich's laptop had been turned over to the FBI for forensic analysis within four days of his murder. The report states evidence found on the laptop proves Rich sent all the stolen documents to an American journalist living in England named, Gavin MacFadyen who routed them to WikiLeaks. MacFadyen isn't available to confirm any of this, because he's dead.

Meanwhile, it's been revealed, Wheeler who has been described by the right wing media as the Rich family's investigator doesn't even work for them. He was hired and his fees are being paid by a third party, who one source claims is Fox News contributor, Ed Butowsky. In addition, it turns out the ex cop, who is playing the part of independent investigator, is a regular Fox news source and is also a sometimes paid contributor. His main brush with fame came in 2007 when he announced to a stunned Fox host there were gangs of lesbians roaming Washington armed with pink pistols, raping young girls. Ten years later the shocking report remains, as they say, unconfirmed.

On Tuesday the Washington Examiner quoted a police source, "with knowledge of the investigation," as saying, "It (the laptop) never contained any emails related to WikiLeaks and the FBI never had it."

Later on Tuesday Wheeler began to do his version of the Hokey Pokey. He admitted he's never actually seen Rich's laptop and what's more, he has only heard of the possibility of evidence on it from a reporter he spoke to for a FoxNews.com story. In other words, Fox reported something as fact and their only evidence is a source who got his information from--you got it--Fox.

In response to the madness, the Rich family issued a statement through a spokesperson to Business Insider which said, "We are a family who is committed to facts, not fake evidence that surfaces every few months to fill the void and distract law enforcement and the general public from finding Seth's murderers."

The spokesperson, Brad Bauman added, "It's sad, but unsurprising that a group of media outlets who have repeatedly lied to the American people would try and manipulate the legacy of a murder victim in order to forward their own political agenda. I think there is a special place in hell for people like that."

Even if there is it won't stop gaggles of malevolent rubes from screeching that Seth Rich was murdered by Hillary Rodham Clinton and her pals. In fact, as these words are being written, we can be sure even Gavin MacFadyen's death is being woven into the conspiracy. That's right--his lung cancer was just another black ops cover story.

Let's face it, there is no end to this delusional merry-go-round ride. That's the pristine perfection of the lunacy. To even attempt to prove these crazy fucks wrong is to become one with the conspiracy. Or, to borrow a phrase from the 1960's and warp it more than a tad, you're either part of the solution, or part of the problem.

Who knew such a concept would last this long?

Indeed.


5-19-17