Yesterday there were some reports that the Department of Homeland Security, Kristi Noem honestly didn't know she was going to be fired by President Donald Trump. If they are true, Ms. Noem just proved herself just as stupid as she was cruel and corrupt. The rumor she would be cut loose had been in the mill for several weeks. Even if she didn't believe them, she should have figured it out after Senators, Thom Tillis and John Kennedy, both republicans, ripped into her during a hearing earlier this week. Tillis, even raked her over the coals for shooting her dog years ago--an ugly story that probably got her the job in the first place. Hell, one can almost hear Stephen Miller telling Trump, "She shot her own fucking dog, Mr. President, just think what she will do to immigrants."
In reality it wasn't her ICE, "surges," in places like LA, Chicago, and even the deadly invasion of Minneapolis, although that particular display of brute sadism was a major PR disaster. It wasn't even her ignoring court orders left and right. No, what finally got Kristi Noem appears to be, first, her failure to build all those ICE prison camps Miller wants. Second, the multimillion dollar ad campaign which not only promoted herself but made a few close friends scads of cash. Unfortunately, the former secretary just learned that sort of blatant, ego stroking, corruption is still reserved for the President and the President alone. Then third, there is that private jet her department bought. It's outfitted with luxury accommodations so posh even Jeffrey-by God-Epstein would be jealous. When Ms. Noem insisted the jet would be used to deport illegal immigrants, one wag noted, "Well I suppose some of them could sit at the bar."
Mere minutes after he canned Noem, Donald Trump appointed Oklahoma's junior Senator, Markwayne Mullin to the job. He is currently the only U.S. Senator without a four-year college degree. He dropped out of a Missouri college in order to take over his dad's plumbing business. He does, however, hold an associate's degree in construction technology from Oklahoma State University Institute of Technology in Okmulgee, Oklahoma. Or as it's known to old timers, Okmulgee Tech.
One supposes an associate's degree in construction technology could be of some help when it comes to building those camps or even finishing off Trump's long forgotten border wall. However, the appointment does not address the main reason for Noem's failure to come through on the camp building. From sea to shining sea communities all across the republic have been refusing to sell her the land, or old warehouse spaces to build them. Indeed, Noem's tactics--while apparently fine with Miller--has flipped public opinion to the point no one wants to be associated in any way with the administration's final solution to the immigrant question.
Mullin doesn't have any practical experience in immigration matters, or Emergency Management, and he doesn't have any history in law enforcement. His main claim to fame during his short stay in the Senate was challenging Teamster's head, Sean O'Brien to fist fight during a committee hearing. After O'Brien accepted, Mullin rose from his seat and told the union leader to, "Get your butt up." Vermont's Bernie Saunders told him to sit down and admonished him by saying, "You're a United States Senator for God's sake."
No one is sure what the outcome of the fight would have been, but the odds probably favored Mullin. He is a former high school wrestling star--the pride of Stillwell High's wrestling room--who had briefly dabbled in Mixed Martial Arts fighting.
Who knows? Maybe it was the confrontation with O'Brien that convinced Miller, Mullin was the man for the job. Well, that and the fact the Jr. Senator from Oklahoma is a MAGA savant with a taste for violence and excuses. After an ICE agent shot at Renee Good multiple times, killing her as she tried to get away from him, Mullin explained to the media, once law enforcement officials draw their weapons, "They never shoot just once." How he learned this is unclear. Perhaps he is a student of intense police dramas like, Sylvester Stallone's, "Judge Dredd."
Mullin now has to be confirmed by the U.S. Senate. His first stop there will be a committee chaired by Kentucky's Rand Paul, a man the Secretary Designate recently described as a, "snake."
Of course, diplomacy is not part of Homeland Security's job, so it sounds like Mullin will fit right in. Some have speculated Trump picked Markwayne Mullin because while he will be just as savage as Noem when it comes to immigrants, he is less prone to self-promotion and torrid romantic affairs with federal employees. As one analyst put it yesterday, the hiring of Mullin to head Homeland Security is like, "Hiring an arsonist to enter a burning building."
As for Kristi Noem? Yesterday, Donald Trump named her as, "The Special Envoy for the Sheild of the Americas." It is a title made up just for her. (One observer said, "Trump probably thought of it right after he saw the last, "Avengers," movie.") It is being reported the position was created in order to provide Noem with a salary and government benefits, guaranteeing she won't run out to sell a tell-all book about her time in the administration.
Yes, rest easy America. Kristi Noem is gone. Your national security and federal emergency assistance has now been entrusted to former House Representative, Senator, and CEO of Mullin Plumbing--Oklahoma's own, Markwayne Mullin.
Sleep well tonight.
3-6-26